Watch Your Relationship Balance Sheet

This past week, during a board meeting for one of our BPV clients, we spent a good amount of time reviewing the financial statements. As most of you know, the financials are a good way to measure the health of a business. One of the most important pieces we review is the balance sheet.

On one side are the assets. These are the things that add value. On the other side are the liabilities. These are the things that drain value. The long-term health of the business depends on the proper balance between the two. After that discussion, it got us thinking. What if we applied the same concept to our relationships?

Let’s call it our Relationship Balance Sheet. Our RBS.

So, how balanced is your RBS right now?

Deposits vs Withdrawals

Every day, we are either making deposits into our relationships or making withdrawals, encouraging someone, and taking time to listen. Call a friend you haven’t talked to in a while. Apologizing when you are wrong.Telling your wife and kids you love them. Hug your kids. These are all deposits. They add value to your RBS.

But we also know the other side of the ledger.

Gossip.Harsh words.Impatience.Focusing only on our own needs and not owning our mistakes. These are withdrawals that slowly drain the account. Most of us have a pretty good idea of our financial balance sheet. But are we paying the same attention to our relationship balance sheet?

Relationships Matter More Than We Think

Men, we have said it many times and remind ourselves often. The strength of our relationships is critical to becoming the men God created us to be. Strong and meaningful relationships sit at the heart of the Christian life. Scripture makes this clear.

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”John 13:34–35

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.”Ecclesiastes 4:9–10

Think about the people around you right now.

• Who could use a lift?

• Who might need encouragement?

• Or have we been so focused on our own schedules and responsibilities that we have left others to pick themselves up?

How we answer that question affects our RBS. It also affects how others see our walk with Christ.

Trust Is Built When Life Gets Messy

“A friend loves at ALL times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”Proverbs 17:17

Trusting relationships are not built when everything is easy. They are revealed when life gets messy, when someone is struggling. When a friend needs help. When things do not go according to plan, being a reliable and trusted friend in those moments is one of the greatest deposits we can make.

Are Your Liabilities Growing?

At this point, some of you might be thinking:

• “OK, guys, I already know this.”

• But do we really live it?

• If you are like us, life gets busy.

Work.Schedules.Responsibilities.Kids.Deadlines.

Before we know it, we assume our relationship balance sheet is healthy.

But if we took a closer look, we might discover something different. Our liabilities may be growing faster than our assets. And when that happens, life and relationships become unsustainable.

A Simple Challenge This Week

As we begin a new week, take a few minutes to review your RBS honestly. Ask yourself a few simple questions.

• Where can I make a deposit this week?

• Who needs encouragement?

• Who could use a phone call?

• Is there someone I need to apologize to?

• Are we giving our spouses and kids the attention they need?

• Are we helping friends who may need a lift?

• Are we spending time in the Word and connecting with God each day?

Decide today what deposits you will make.

Monitor your relationship balance sheet with the same attention you give your financial balance sheet. Because in the end, God values your RBS most.

Have a great week and make some deposits.

Jeremy and Bill